Friday, June 24, 2016

Double Negative = Bring it on!

I can do all things! = I can do whatever I want!
Or, no? Ok, I'll put the loaf of bread back. 

But I can paint like Picasso, should I choose!
Some of Society: A child with special needs may accomplish nothing significant in life. (NEGATIVE)

Some Doctors: Many milestones will be impossible for this child to reach. (NEGATIVE)

Me: Nothing is impossible! (NEGATIVE+NEGATIVE=POSITIVE!)

Except for my eloquent writing, I tend to keep my thoughts to myself. Sometimes, however, my obsessions inadvertently cast some light onto what I am thinking. And in one of these vast obsessions lies my response to all the naysayers and fear mongers out there.

This song, my anthem - and my latest obsession:



Very apropos, don't you think?

When mommy popped the new CD into the car stereo a couple of months ago, just to "check it out," I was immediately drawn to the first song, by Planetshakers. And we haven't moved on from there. It is literally the only song we hear while driving.

All.The.Time.

Lest I riot.

As soon as the last drumroll rolls, I'm already demanding, "Again! Again!" both verbally and in sign language for additional emphasis. If it is not replayed instantly, I may start kicking the seat in front of me. Abandon all caution while driving! Just hit repeat! The song must go on.

My obsession with this song is for good reason. I have connected with it on a deep level because the message speaks to me. While many say, you can't - sometimes even I say it - God reminds me, "YES, I CAN!" Because it's him who gives me strength.

This song pumps me up on the way to school and eases me back home in the afternoon. It accompanies me on my way to therapy. And it is an appropriate prelude on the way to ballet. I actually sing to it, quite "impossibly" finishing the word "impossible."

And when I have the opportunity to dance or drum to it, watch out world!


So, do you believe in me??

"'For I know the plans that I have for you,’ declares the Lord,
‘plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope.'"
Jeremiah 29:11

"Nothing Is Impossible"

Through You
I can do anything
I can do all things
Cause it's You who give me strength
Nothing is impossible
Through You
Blind eyes are opened
Strongholds are broken
I am living by faith
Nothing is impossible!

I'm not gonna live by what I see
I'm not gonna live by what I feel
Deep down I
Know that You're here with me
I know that, You can do anything

I believe, I believe
I believe, I believe in You


Tuesday, June 14, 2016

Breaking News!

This just happened.

Yes. I've joined the world of academia's erudite intellectuals.  
A long time in coming. Perhaps too long (but no one will ever be sure). Nevertheless, after a long-awaited eye check up in May - a World War that required three adults to hold me down, one to peel my eyelids apart and another to calmly and accurately look into my eye sockets with instruments that require accuracy, precision and nerves of steel while I shrieked as if undergoing torture - both the ophthalmologist and optometrist dispatched us with a piece of paper that read: He needs glasses. Yesterday. 

Well, perhaps that paper contained numbers and other medical terms, but the end result was the same. 

After recovering from the trauma that was the eye exam, mommy now had to figure out how glasses would materialize for me, what our insurance covers and where, because naturally only one shop in the entire city works with our insurance company. But on a positive note it is across the street from us. But on another note, they don't have a wide selection. And the selection only got slimmer.

Instantly, mommy eliminated the vulgar brightly colored frames that scream, "I am a CHILD! Can you TELL?" And then she nixed the Coke-bottle round frames made of one piece of continuous plastic with no hinges whatsoever which scream, "I am a SPECIAL NEEDS child! And clearly everyone expects me to break my glasses so I got this unbreakable one-piece number! Can you tell??!!"

And so she was left with approximately one set of frames.

It took another World War to actually try on these frames because, as a rule, no one and nothing should ever touch my head and face: not your caressing fingers, not a brush, not shampoo and not ever a hat. And especially not spectacles that are pressed to my cheeks and strapped around the back with elastic.

Important questions remained unanswered. Which shape was best for my face? Which color complemented my skin tone? Which would stay on my tiny bridge? These were all questions only God could answer since I forbade any meaningful trying on of frames.

We left the store empty-handed.

After recovering from that trauma, and in a superb leap of blind faith, mommy just went back to the eye glass shop one day, without me, ordered the closest-to-tortoise-shell-plastic-nearly unbreakable glasses she could find. And that was that. 

Mommy enjoyed the ceasefire until the glasses arrived replete with prescription lenses. With World War 3 looming large on the horizon, Mommy took GongGong and myself to the store.

GongGong braced himself, knowing the tsunami that was to come. See, mommy waits for the grandparents' visits to schedule all of my most challenging medical appointments. Such as the ones that involve invasive probings into eyes and ears, blood tests, long commutes and much rebellion. They are her wingmen, her bag carriers, her crew to help simultaneously restrain and entertain me with song, dance and iPads. This enables her to ask serious questions and finish conversations with doctors without me threatening to delve into their surgical supplies and trash their medicine cabinets.

And while grandparents are usually successful, nothing prepared them - or anyone - for the horror that was the eye test and subsequent trying on of glasses.

As we arrived at the glasses store I started my backwards two-step to the exit, knowing what awaited me. GongGong braced himself. Mommy dragged me forward. Everyone in the store tried to convince me that these new lens were going to change my worldview. I vehemently disagreed.

Fifteen torturous minutes later, an emergency call was placed to abba who arrived with some sort of magical calming effect that no one can explain. I compiled almost instantly. Glasses went on. And I looked great! And I saw great, which apparently is more important!

In utter disbelief, GongGong leaned back on one of the chairs allowing his frayed nerves and elevated blood pressure to return to normal. Mommy started breathing again as her heartbeat stabilized. But both knew that only time and a bottle of wine would restore them to their pre-frazzled state, hours if not days later.

I for one was unfazed by the event. In fact, I've never looked back. But I did see better!


A whole new world to discover!
I still employ my sideways glance.
Ill-fated attempts at grandparents-grandchildren shots

But here's our first family shot with my glasses! 
And with my new found vision, I was able to bid
farewell to MM&GG as they sojourned back to America. 
Thanks for all your help refereeing my appointments! See you soon on the other side of the Atlantic.